Thank you for the translation, Miss A.A. Click for the translation !
Scientist and God
One day a group of scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him.The scientist walked up to God and said, " God, we've decided that we no longer need you. We're to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don't you just go on and get lost."
God listened very patiently and kindly to the man and after the scientist was done talking, God said, " Very well, how about this, let's say we have a man making contest." To which the scientist replied, " OK, great!" But God added, " Now, we're going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam." The scientist said, " Sure, no problem" and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt. God just looked at him and said, " No, no, no. You go get your own dirt!"
Jesus and Satan
Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was better on his computer. They had been going at it for days, and God was tired of hearing all of the bickering. Finally God said, " Cool it. I am going to set up a test that will run two hours and I will judge who does the better job."
So down Satan and Jesus sat at the keyboards and typed away. They did spreadsheets. They wrote reports. They sent faxes. They sent e-mail. They downloaded. They did some genealogy reports. They made cards. They did every known job. About ten minutes before their time was up, lightning flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, the rain poured, and, of course, the electricity went off.
Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. Jesus just sighed. The electricity finally flickered back on, and each of them rebooted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming " It's gone! It's all gone! I lost everything when the power went out!" Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours.
Satan observed this and became very irate: " Wait! He must have cheated. How did he do that?" God shrugged and said, " Jesus saves."